Notorious Noah wakes up in the back room of a warehouse. He has to move around a lot because he is wanted for criminal activity. He flips on the radio and listens to the news. He hears them talking about him, as usual. “Notorious Noah strikes again,” the newscaster says,
“otherwise known as 7-11, his criminal name.” He has that name because he yearns to be notorious. He grew up in a huge family and went to a huge school and no one ever really knew him, so now he wants to do something to make himself widely known. He goes around the country stealing exactly $711 and a Dr. Pepper from 7-11 stores.
“Ha ha, I got them again,” Notorious Noah thinks to himself. He looks at the calendar and realizes it is 7/11, July 11th, Free Slurpee Day at 7-11! That means it will be super- crowded. Notorious Noah gets on Twitter to tweet that he is going to have the biggest party ever at 7-11 for Free Slurpee Day and that no one will ever catch him! He tweets every morning so that he will become even more notorious, like yesterday when he tweeted a clue about which 7-11 he was going to rob, so people would go look for him. Just as he is finishing this, his cousin, Candid Carol shows up. Carol marches in and gets right to the point. She is always honest and straightforward and never holds back. She slams down a newspaper and says, “Notorious Noah, I need you to steal something for me. I would do it myself, but I don’t want to get caught. There’s a museum that just opened, and I need you to get the Dragon Gem for me because I am coveting it! I’m totally broke and I need the money.”
Notorious Noah exclaims, “Whoa, I gotta get that gem! That will make me even more infamous.” Notorious Noah pulls off his 7-11 heist and says, “Now I’m gonna go bigger!” as he heads to the museum. When he gets there he sees lots of people, lots of security cameras and guards, and lots of Wanted signs everywhere with his picture on them. That makes him happy because he loves being notorious. Notorious Noah makes a plan for that night. He hires one person to drive the getaway van. He hires another person to disable the security cameras, and he hires two guys to go in and help him take out the guards. When he gets in, he runs straight to the exhibit with the Dragon Gem. He replaces the real gem with a sham gem that is akin to the real one. It is reddish-orange, like fire, but has some glue on it that you can see if you look closely.
As soon as Notorious Noah leaves, he sees a line of police cars blocking his exit, and lots of police. They arrest him, and he feels ashamed because he has never gotten caught before. He had just planned this amazing party and can’t go. When Notorious Noah gets to jail, he realizes that he isn’t as notorious as others in there. He begins to mull this over, thinking deeply about his life. He is loath to do this, because it makes him feel like a failure. He overhears a guard: “I heard that Dangerous Danny just got out on good behavior.” This gives Noah an idea; he decides to let go of being notorious and to become Nice Noah while he’s in jail, so he can hopefully get out sooner. He begins to pamper the guards and criminals by getting them what they want. The guards give him things to help him break out because they want to be that person who catches him. If he breaks out, he’ll become even more notorious, and whoever catches him will become the best guard ever. A new guard gives Noah a crowbar and a gun, and he escapes. He makes a quick appearance at his 7-11 party and declares, “Notorious Noah is back!” With this new energy to become even more notorious than before, who knows what Noah will do next?
The End