Dear Father,

This war is getting out of hand. It was early morning in Sharpsburg when I heard a huge roar of cannons and guns just five feet away from me. It was the first invasion of the North, so I was shocked to see what I saw. Little did I know, this would be the most tiring day of my life. In total, there were around 15,000 soldiers killed or wounded. Lee and his Confederate army left after 12 gruesome hours. I knew that this battle I was a part of, would become one of the most bloody days in United States history. Being somebody inside the war, I believe this battle only changes the United States population. Yesterday, September 17, 1862, made everybody wonder, “how much worse can it get from here?”

It’s been very, very hard. As a doctor in the war, you get almost no credit, no matter how hard you’re working. It is September 18, 1862, Sharpsburg, and from what I saw yesterday, I don’t think I’ll ever recover. I’m so traumatized and scarred from what I saw. There were men and men coming in for help, I could only work on one person at a time. At the end of the battle, I only ended up saving 11 people. I’m so disappointed with myself, I could’ve done so much better. On the other hand, I don’t know if I should be blaming myself completely because I had barely any tools and the workspace was so dirty. People glare at me because it’s my fault. I’m a doctor and I should be the one saving people. People are calling me sawbone and butcher. Anyway, other men are writing to their families, wondering if it’ll be the last note they’ll ever send. If this is also my last letter, I wanted to say I love you, just in case I die, I  died fighting hard.

From,

Your son