Thursday, July 29th, 1863

Dearest India, 

I’m so very sorry that I haven’t responded to your letter until now. Alden has been visiting us for the summer. It has been lovely but at the same time he isn’t acting like himself. He has been here for almost a week and has only talked about the war when it was brought up by another. I don’t know if something happened at his school or what, but My Darling, this isn’t the same Alden we know. Mother agrees, she thinks he is sick and needs tending, I think it might have to do with food, or lack thereof – but I’m worried he still wants to fight in the war. Whatever is wrong, he definitely needs tending, do you have any suggestions?

I was so excited to get your letter in the mail, but the real reason I haven’t responded until now is because I didn’t know how. Even though we know each other’s deepest darkest secrets and you are my best friend, I was afraid. You have started writing uwith all of these fancy words like ‘eubacterium’ and ‘infectious’ and ‘microscopic organisms’. In fact, I had to ask Mother and Father what one of them meant, they didn’t know either (what does inanition mean). I guess you have just been growing up, and I was worried you would grow away from me, but I see how greedy that was, and I pray you can forgive me. Mother always says greed is my personal seventh deadly sin, she says yours is pride. I have to help Mother during the day, but at night I have been reading the book you sent me. I find it interesting, but I do not share the same enthusiasm of mens’ science as you do. Do you think you’ll be visiting anytime soon? I don’t want to wait until the war is over to see you! 

Speaking of the war, some Union soldiers were ambushed not that far away, in Buffington Island. The South was out matched 2:1. I’m sure you’re used to the sound of gunshots by now, but for us, it was a fright. I can only imagine what you have seen these past few years, and we can only pray that we will still know each other when we see each other next. Sometimes I lie ‘wake in bed and think about how things might be different if you had come with us, but I understand that you had to stay. I just wish this war will end soon, it is so pointless. If God wanted us to solve our problems by fighting, why would he have given us voices? Please tell the Trimble’s I’m sorry for their losses, and the Speckle’s to stay out of trouble. Tell your family I send them my prayers and 1 union dollar (it’s all I can spare). Give everyone my love, and stay safe my darling India.

Julia Pardoe