12/25/1864.   

To my dear wife, Anne,

It has been eight weeks since I arrived at my post at the Andersonville prison here in Georgia, and it has been horrific. Me and the other guards are forced to walk around in the stench of rotten bodies. Captain Winder has been requesting aid, but we have yet to hear back from Richmond. We are made to enforce the deadline, to distribute food, and much more without enough supplies, or support. I see prisoners dying, I see them starving and I see them praying.  It is miserable my darling. I want nothing more than to see you and the boys again. 

Everyday I eat my rations, which usually consist of cornmeal, or something of  the sort. I talk to the other guards. They have their own families back home. In fact, your friend Caroline’s husband is here. His name is John, I think. Us and the others talk about our lives back home, among many things. I told them about our children, Tom and David, and many of them had children too. After a while I even started to talk to some of the prisoners. I would trade them chewing tobacco or some extra hardtack for belongings they had managed to sneak into the stockade. One man had a necklace of a cross, another had a knife. I do it not for personal gain, but to keep myself from falling into depression. One of the new guards had a checkers board, so we brought it into the camp and played with some of the prisoners. 

I feel like it’s all pointless now. I think we were right to secede, but I believe that this isn’t worth it. I don’t want to fight, I don’t want to guard, and I don’t want to kill people. This is why I have a proposition to you. I have contacted my mother and father, and they have confirmed that they have a spare room big enough for you, me, and the boys. If we can get to port Charleston, we can get passage to England. I can fake illness, and get sent to a hospital. From there, i can meet you in Charleston. Please think about this.

-Your Loving Husband, Zacharias