“Pink was for girls. Girly girls who wore flavored lip gloss and read magazines and talked on the phone lying on their perfect,lacy bedspreads with their feet in the air. Girls who spent six months looking for the perfect dress to wear to the school formal.

Girls who liked boys.” ― Lili Wilkinson, author of the lights go out and from black to pink she is one of my queer heros. I want to open my essay with that. On because for all I know I am the only lesbian in my class. People already know so I am not spilling my secrets. But being a kid and knowing that you are lesbian is hard.

Some months ago I walked through the door to the fifth grade west classroom. I was excited and hoped that this year would be better than the last. When I met my teachers they seemed nice and they welcomed me to a new year of school. A couple days later they did presentations about themselves one was so open about being lesbiean  I saw a new side of what I could be that I ignored. Weeks later I cut my hair and I knew I was lesbian. 

When I came to school with my hair cut. Everyone was surprised I even surprised my friend Mira enough to have her open her mouth so wide she looked like one of the dead frozen fish at whole foods.That day I spent one whole recess with my friends walking around petting the fluffy part of my hair. I remember looking in the mirror with my hair cut thinking about this I remember the night I told my dad that I am lesbian and he said “You know I thought it was a lesbian hair cut.”  but I know he will always love me Some people share there stories others don’t but I know what ever this will get me I will find my own way.

When I grew to accept I was lesbian I had to find people who would understand first I told my friend Maya she told me that one of my best friends Amaya is bisexual (I got permision to put her in my essay.)  and I told her that I am lesbiean also. I told my other friends in the trunk at the playground we were all different and no matter what we accepted each other.  But it was hard to tell my friends who didn’t livein such a  gay accepting place as san francisco I told them at a sleepover one of them had an idea to look for our “types” and when I told them I was lesbiean they changed the google search from boy to girl. 

When I knew that I was lesbian  and I didn’t tell people yet I was very scared,insucure about my identity and who I wasfor the months before I told people. But my friends never thought less of me because I was lesbiean. And when I told my parents they were very accepting.     

I think in the future the world will be more accepting and hopefully not as bleak as hollywood portrays it and even with global warming we can still stand together and embrace the change in our society. With a perspective, I am Lillie Rosenfeld Kurek.